I remember this feeling. I hate it.
I feel inferior, used, taken for granted, lonely, abused, upset.

I hate this feeling.

I don't understand how I cabe surrounded by all these people and hear all these "I love you"'s and still feel like nobody cares about anything I do.

I worry more and more every minute. Oh god. I can't be, there can't be. It couldn't have happened. Now what? Does it stay, does it go? Does that make me a bad person. It say's I'm not, but I have this nagging feeling in the pit of my stomach that just screams, "STUPID JAKI! WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?? NOW YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THIS. IDIOT GIRL."

I keep saying "I". Don't ask why. If you don't know now, maybe you don't deserve to know. Maybe you do, but I have just neglected to inform you, the fact of the matter is that I am ignored. I am looked over, I am a statue that serves only to look after others. As soon as the situation turns around and I need something, everything becomes a huge commotion and overly dramatic. I not equipped to deal with this anymore. I want to get help, I want to talk to other kids with the same problem, but I don't want things to get worse at home.

Oh. Well. It's a good thing I've got years and years of experience in this department, otherwise I might be upset.